By Stephen Walker, Ph.D.

The Business Problem.

Business, municipal and non-profit organizations all experience costs associated with turnover.  Every position within an organization is expensive to replace, but the cost can be significant when considering a highly skilled technical employee, or astronomical should the loss come at the executive level.  The greater the investment an organization has in the training and productive work of an individual, the more costly to replace him or her.  Whether an individual is terminated for poor performance or lost through a health challenge or death…..costs are incurred.  Succession planning, cross training, and health screenings can be instrumental in reducing the damage done by such a loss, but many organizations fail to consider such things when planning strategically for their future.

Health challenges contribute additional costs which may include medical expenses, short or long term disability costs, and perhaps funeral costs should death take a key employee.  Loss attributable to heart attack and stroke is a common occurrence these days.  It is also one of the easiest to predict.  Heart disease will ultimately be the cause of death for half of us, and for those planning on retiring…it’s sobering to realize that a full 30% of us will never reach the age of sixty five.  Heart disease can be managed effectively if caught in time. Unfortunately the first cardiac symptom experienced by 71% of the population will be a heart attack, and, one out of every three of those will not survive.₁ Because the bottom line drives business, it might be worth considering how much it might cost your organization if you or some other vital employee were lost to a heart attack or stroke?

Assessing the Costs.

A loss will definitely trigger a ripple effect throughout the business. A few of the measurable outcomes can help determine the financial impact on your organization. Some person or position-specific factors will require a closer look, depending on the individual’s role in the organization. Whether technical, administrative or sales oriented every position will have administrative costs, the search for a suitable replacement, recruitment, education, training, and lost productivity.  It is also true that health insurance premiums may be impacted for the coming year since companies are rated based on the collective health history of their employees.  Perhaps the greatest loss is not even measurable.  Nobody can replace an individual whose personality or leadership boosted morale, touched the lives of many, and provided cohesion for the whole.

The Current Approach.

As of this writing, prevention is largely an afterthought for businesses and insurance carriers.  They tend to employ a ‘one size fits all’ approach emphasizing diet and exercise.  Some companies provide optional stress management classes for their employees.  Kaiser-Permanente encourages quarterly lipid profiles.  These efforts may be successful to a limited degree, but are rather conventional and not precise enough to consider the loss of a key person, or the cost of turnover. Basically screening programs and prospective measures neither identify who is at greatest risk nor do they equip them with the tools to help them remedy the problem.

Stress Management programs provide an excellent example. Stress, has long been known as a contributing factor in heart disease, but programs addressing this concern tend to be optional and limited to 1-2 hours once a year for those who self-select to attend.  Ironically, the most stressed employees often ‘trivialize’ the benefits of a stress management program, or feel that they are too busy doing productive work to attend.  Others may be in denial of the stress they are under and fail to understand their personal risk factors.  They view ‘cranky’ behavior as a fact of life and unavoidable.  Some pride themselves in giving ulcers not getting them.  The lack of consideration for their personal health aside, ‘team’ chemistry is impacted by such attitudes.

It is precisely this individual that needs a process for screening, and a personalized assessment of their risk factors….because they are least likely to do it for themselves.  As a business owner, your chief executive officers, highly trained experts and employees whose loss could severely interfere with the operations of your organization are of greatest concern. Are lipid profiles, stress treadmills, and other examples of the ‘one size fits all’ approach for risk assessment enough?  Not likely.

A proper screening for occupational stress would assess the degree to which chronic stress, anger, hostility, anxiety, depression, negative emotions and social isolation play into each individual’s risk profile. Research in this area has revealed a clear understanding as to how toxic emotions alter a person’s blood chemistry contributing to heart disease.₂ Cardiac psychology and effective stress assessments are only part of the solution. The key lies in the use of ‘stratified risk assessments’ and ‘targeted interventions’ which have grown out of the developing specialization of preventive cardiology. Dr. Harvey Hecht, Director of Preventive Cardiology at NY’s Beth Israel Hospital, asserted, “There is no doubt that President Clinton would have been identified as high risk 10 years ago — if he had undergone calcium scanning—and the odds are great that bypass surgery could have been avoided.”₃

‘The Best Medicine.’

A model program has been developed in recent years involving a notoriously high risk population; that of former NFL professional football players.  Although there is agreement that these athletes have a significantly reduced life expectancy, the exact age is somewhat in dispute (estimations ranging from 52 to early 60’s depending on the data source).  One thing that is clear is that heart disease is by far the biggest killer. ₄

This model intervention has been termed ‘The Best Medicine.’  Research supporting this kind of stratified risk assessment and targeted treatment regimen has been accruing over the past several years._5,6 This sample included 100 members of The Denver Bronco Football Club Alumni ranging in age from 35 to 61 years who were provided an opportunity and self-selected to participate in the study. With the support of several doctors lead by preventive cardiologist, Dr. Jeffrey Boone and program coordinator, Toni Standley, researchers, sponsoring agencies, venders and pharmaceutical manufacturers….the Bronco Alumni were provided a state-of-the-art intervention, have been treated proactively and continuously monitored since, utilizing the stratified risk assessment and a targeted intervention for each participant addressing every known indicator for heart disease in that patient. The protocols used in this research included both traditional and more progressive techniques for evaluating and treating heart disease (CAD). The research effort is ongoing.

Traditional patient intake information included age, family history, medical history, lifestyle risk factors, Framingham risk assessment, cardiac symptoms, history of medical procedures, situation specific blood pressure response, medication reviews, exercise patterns, health risk behaviors, smoking and obesity screening. Additional diagnostic testing included:

• Electron Beam CT Scan
• Treadmill Stress Test                     
• Stress Echocardiogram or Cardiac Ultrasound
• NMR, PLAQ test – LpPLa (2) screening
• Carotid IMT
• Aspirin Resistence Test
• Life Stress Assessments

These variables and others were utilized while tracking specific indicators of disease after a baseline heart health status was determined.  For those in good health, very few treatment measures were recommended beyond daily aspirin, exercise regimens, dietary adjustments, nutritional supplements, stress management and additional testing as needed.  Alumni presenting with data suggestive of progressive CAD were treated aggressively with medication management using statins, ace inhibitors, anti-inflammatory agents, platelet coagulation inhibitors and selective nutritional supplements in addition to recommended lifestyle changes.  No extensive procedures such as bypass grafting, angiography, or nuclear perfusion studies were deemed necessary amongst the treatment sample.

Results of this approach using a stratified risk assessment and targeted treatment regimen have been documented and monitored quarterly.  Thus far, at the end of one calendar year, the overall intervention has been significantly effective at reducing symptom indicators of CAD.₇ These interim results demonstrate how risk stratification is cost effective as a screening method.  Even more importantly, the targeted intervention for specific risk factors demonstrated unequivocally that the progression of heart disease can actually be reversed when patient specific treatment guidelines are proactively implemented.

Benefits of Early Detection and Treatment of CAD.

The cumulative research in this field is now able to identify with greater clarity how the disease progresses.  The crucial role is played by each person’s blood chemistry.  Not only is blood chemistry highly variable, it is influenced by diet, emotional reactions to stress, exercise (or lack of), dental health and a number of genetic and environmental factors.  Because the blood serves to transport hormonal messages, nutrients and waste products to and from specific organs in the body, it is also the carrier of other by-products that can be harmful to the cardiovascular system itself. Often referred to as metabolic syndrome, a process is engaged that progressively damages the lining of the blood vessels themselves (endothelial dysfunction).  Once compromised, inflammation sets in, frequently contributing to the coagulation of platelets sometimes causing clots to form.  Any or all of these steps can create unstable plaque and trigger a thrombosis….resulting in a heart attack or stroke.₈

In July 2006 the American Heart Association published guidelines for the early detection and treatment of the physical markers of heart disease through the SHAPE initiative.₉ SHAPE stands for ‘screening for heart attack prevention and education’ which summarizes the body of research and provides guidelines which recommend stratified risk assessments and targeted interventions.  Many of these tests and procedures are not covered by traditional insurance reimbursement formularies.  This reality places even more responsibility on our corporate citizens to take care of their own bottom line.

Unfortunately, our healthcare system tends to respond best to heart disease once a patient has had a heart attack, even though the patient’s quality of life and survivability may be compromised significantly after the fact. Once afflicted, these patients subsequently utilize a larger percentage of the total healthcare resources available.  Estimates in 2004 by the Center of Disease Control indicate the financial costs of heart disease at 396 billion dollars.₁₀ ‘The Best Medicine’ is one of a number of leading programs designed to lower the costs of heart disease by employing a stratified risk assessment and proactively addressing those causative factors.  At the very minimum, this approach saves lives by preventing the incidence of heart attack and stroke.

Risk Stratification as a Business Solution – The ROI.

The CFO of an organization considering this type of screening would likely determine the variables assessing the potential return on investment of a stratified risk assessment such as this. Because no two businesses or municipal organizations are exactly alike this return must be determined on a case-by-case basis. Models for assessing the cost of turnover have rarely been modified for such a purpose.  Even less frequently are they weighed against the direct costs of a prevention initiative.  Models exist for evaluating the cost benefit of sales training programs, or the effectiveness of an advertising campaign, but the process for assessing the ROI of a strategically designed health and wellness intervention requires a more specialized formula.

What to Measure?

One model for measuring costs of turnover was developed by Dr. Michael Mercer, consultant with The Mercer Group, in his book, Turning Human Resource Departments into a Profit Center.₁₁ It is designed for the expressed purpose of evaluating the costs of turnover within an organization.  His model provides a good baseline.  We have modified it to include both the direct costs of a heart attack or stroke, in addition to some variable costs including:

• Separation Costs
• Replacement Costs
• Training Costs
• Lost Productivity Costs
• Lost Business Costs
• Disability Costs
• Costs from Death of an Employee

In situations where key employees have died, been taken ill, or injured on the job there are likely to be additional costs to the organization. Companies that experience the loss of a highly trained employee are not only responsible for the replacement costs for that employee, they may also have to deal with some additional medical expenses and incidental costs. Some organizations, such as fire and police departments, have extraordinary costs associated with the burial, ceremonies, and replacement officer uniform costs. In recent years, higher deductibles and stop loss expense caps allow for the estimation of some of these additional cost factors, but they do little to address them. More responsibility is continuously being placed on the corporations themselves and each employee through ‘consumer driven health care plans’.₁₂ Companies that self-insure have the most incentive to employ stratified risk assessments and targeted treatment regimens.

A Case Study.

In January of 2006 a 55 year old Fire Chief completed his annual physical. The physical was normal except for an abnormal EKG, which was considered not diagnostically significant.  The Chief reported that he felt fine, had no experience of chest pain or any other symptoms of heart disease, and indicated he was unconcerned with the abnormal EKG. A few days later he was seen by a cardiologist who conducted a stress treadmill which also appeared abnormal. It was followed by a perfusion study. Circulatory impairments clearly existed.  The Chief stopped work

immediately and was placed on short-term disability. Subsequent angiography determined that the Chief’s problems were systemic and surgery was required immediately. He then received four coronary arterial bypass grafts, was hospitalized for 5 days and his duties were absorbed in-house by the Deputy Chief of Administration and the Assistant Chief of Operations for the department.

Unfortunately there were complications.  Two of the grafts failed and an additional procedure resulted in the placement of stents repairing the grafts.  After three days, the Chief was released from the hospital and again started phase I rehab. A month later, symptoms appeared requiring plural effusion studies and another hospitalization this time for an infection and mild pericarditis.  Intravenous antibiotics controlled the infection and he has been steadily improving since, first in rehab and now on his own.  Following his 56^th birthday, the Chief decided he should retire and was placed on permanent disability.

The financial aspects of this case-study incorporate the current outcome and costs of the incident as it impacted the organization, the chief, the insurance carrier, the department’s obligations in providing insurance, short-term disability, long-term disability, the costs of separation, and replacement costs as of this writing. A search is currently underway for his replacement.  The organization is using a headhunter to identify and recruit properly trained and experienced candidates.

In the eleven months since the ordeal began, the medical expenses realized by the Chief, the department, and the insurance carrier have reached $196,000.  The cost of lost productivity to the department was estimated at $47,420.  The organization anticipates replacement costs for recruitment and hiring of his successor to be between $40,000 and $45,000 depending on travel expenses, moving, and uniform costs. The total cost of this episode to the parties concerned has been conservatively estimated at $277,470 to date.  The stress incurred by those assuming additional responsibilities is not considered measurable, nor is the stress incurred by their families who were required to adjust to these extraordinary demands placed upon them.  The required yet unpaid overtime has not been calculated because those affected are salaried and exempt employees.

The costs of replacing that one employee could have funded a risk stratification screening for every employee and included a Life Stress Interview, EBCT heart Scan, blood lipid particle test (NMR), and a carotid IMT test for all 117 department employees…AND RETURNED $210,000 to the respective responsible parties.  Just the direct costs incurred by the department in lost productivity and replacement costs would have funded the SHAPE guidelines for every career and volunteer employee.  The peace of mind and the benefits experienced by every family, their children, and smooth operations of the organization….priceless.

Copyright  © 2007   Stephen E. Walker, Ph.D.

References:

1)       American Heart Association: Heart Disease and Stroke Statistics – 2006 Update. Dallas, Texas, American Heart Association, 2006.

2)       Rozanski, A, Blumenthal, J, Davidson K, Saab P, Kubzansky L, “The Epidemiology, Pathophysiology, and Management of Psychosocial Risk Factors in Cardiac Practice”, J Am Coll Cardiol 2005;45:5:637-651.

3)       Hecht, Harvey, “Aggressive Testing for and Treatment of Heart Disease and Stroke”, Seminar Procedings, Denver, Colorado, Nov.19, 2005.

4)       National Institute for Occupational Safety and Health Study in conjunction with the NFL Players Assn., Proceedings 1992.

5)       Bard, R., Kalsi, H., Rubenfire, M., Wakefield, T., Fex, B., Rajagopalan, S., & Brook, R., Effect of Carotid Atherosclerosis Screening on Risk Stratification During Primary Cardiac Disease Prevention, Am.Journal of Cardiology, Vol 93; 8: April 2004, 1030-1032.

6)       Yusuf S, Hawkin S, Ounpuu S, et al. “Effect of Potentially Modifiable Risk Factors Associated with Myocardial Infarction in 52 Countries (The INTERHEART Study): Case-control Study. Lancet 2004;364:937-52.

7)       Boone, J. and Standley, T. Preliminary data – Denver Bronco Alumni Program to Eradicate Heart Disease and Stroke, September 2006.

8)       Berger, G., Hartwell, D., Wagner, D., “P-Selectin and Platelet Clearance”, Blood, Vol. 92:11, December 1998: pp. 4446-4452.

9)       Screening for Heart Attack Prevention and Education Taskforce – Guidelines published in the American Journal of Cardiology, July 2006.

10)    Center for Disease Control and Prevention, Preventing Chronic Diseases: Investing Wisely in Health – 2005 (Center for Disease Control and Prevention).

11)    Mercer, M., Turning Human Resource Departments Into a Profit Center., Castlegate Publishers, Inc., Barrington Il., 2005.

12)    Herzlinger, R., Consumer Driven Healthcare: Implications for Providers, Payors, and Policy Makers., Harvard University Press, Boston, 2004.

He was doing his best to keep from breaking down, but the tears filled his eyes, the emotions were raw and he was lost. “Whatever I do it’s never good enough”… was what he uttered, but the pain in his body was palpable.  His name was Kyle – Wolfie to his teammates.  He just turned 12.  He was a gifted goalie – rated number one in the state, and he was playing competitive hockey for a AAA team engaged in a travel schedule as busy as the local Division I team.  For him, the pressure was over-the-top.  Not just because the competition was intense, which it was, but he was afraid to let his hero down.

In tonight’s game, he’d let in a good goal on a 2-on-1 breakaway when the save rebounded in the wrong direction.  His team won, and they celebrated, but he’d lost the shut-out and he was sure to hear about it.  The pressure to please his father had even hurt his game because he found himself losing focus on the ice by glancing in his dad’s direction…hoping for a smile or a “thumbs up”…or anything other than the frown he saw much of the time.  But then, the glare was nothing compared to getting reamed.  One time he almost threw up when his dad had screamed in his face like a drill sergeant he’d seen in the movies.  Boy!  He hated that.

Hockey is as intense a game as there is.  Hockey ‘moms’ and ‘dads’ are known to be passionate.  But this behavior is so over-the-top, it’s also risky.

Putting Things in Perspective

Kyle was referred to me by his goalie coach.  He had witnessed some of his dad’s critical behavior, and, he had noticed that Kyle was losing some of his snap… seemed distracted and wasn’t playing up to his potential.

As it turns out, Kyle’s Dad came from a family where much of the pressure to perform rested on his shoulders.  He played linebacker on his Varsity Football team and readily confessed to me an experience that gave me hope for this father-son duo.  The story goes like this:

In an important game he’d played against a league rival, he had registered 13 unassisted tackles, 2 more assists, defended a pass in coverage, knocked down a pass on a blitz, caused an opponent to fumble and generally wreaked havoc on the opposing team’s offense.  At the end of the game he remembered his dad fixating on one play….one where he had taken the fake on a reverse play and lost contain.  It resulted in an 8 yard gain for their rivals.  Geez, a game like that and the only thing his dad could talk about after the game was him blowing that play.

Parental behavior like this is emotionally abusive and it easily runs from generation to generation.  Too many parents from the mold of this scenario consider me one of those ‘touchy feely’ types.  They fail to recognize the impact of their behavior on their children – and – they tend to discount feedback from “others” who might weigh-in on “their” situation.  That often includes coaches, teachers, other parents who witness the abuse….worse still….even when that other person is their spouse.  Parents like this listen to no one, and as such, they often undermine their athletes’ coaches.

Priority One: Becoming Aware – Recognizing Where Passion Stops and Abuse Begins

Truth be told, this kind of situation exists more often than any of us would like to admit.  And those passionate about their sport have not only seen it, but likely been a guilty party themselves once or twice.  The gut check required to get this pattern under control is not for sissies.  And that’s why so many continue to perpetuate the tribulations of abuse.

People who have difficulty with boundaries are at greatest risk.  It’s probably been a factor elsewhere in their life, but when it involves a child learning, and growing and becoming – there is more at risk.  Rather than helping the child athlete discover for themselves what coaches are trained to teach them, these parents tend to take over.  They might not even communicate their thoughts with the coach – but they don’t hesitate to put forward their opinions at home.  What’s worse is that parents like this often don’t have enough insight to recognize their own limitations.  In extreme cases, they treat their child athlete like a possession where they alone control their child’s experiences.

If I were to tell parents like this their kids will likely drop out of sport in rebellion, or find really dysfunctional ways to get by – they’d deny it.  But the fact is: When the fear of reprisal, discouragement and disappointment expressed by one or both parents – outweigh the joy of ‘team’ cohesion, sense of accomplishment and personal pride in seeing your game improve – the formula gets so far out of balance that there isn’t enough to play for. By the time an athlete stops having fun and starts to think that what they do “is never good enough” – they’re in trouble.  It is incumbent on every coach, trainer, manager, league administrator and parent to be attuned to situations like this and do their best to prevent it. Why?  Because they can…and…if they don’t try – they become part of the problem.

The Styles of Parenting Continuum

Imagine six parents, each with a different parenting style, sitting in the dentist’s waiting room with their six children. The kids are running wild, acting out, and getting into trouble. Here’s what the parents might say and do:

• The abusive parent says, “Get your ugly butt over here you stupid little creep!” (smacks, screams, tears).
• The conditional parent says, “I can’t believe you would behave like this, you’re embarrassing me, we’re leaving. I told you we were going to go get ice cream later but I changed my mind. You won’t be having ice cream for three weeks!”
• The assertive parent says, “Sarah, this behavior is out of line. Sit down right next to me. Now please. And now might be a good time to start that homework you brought.”
• The supportive parent says, “Tommy, what’s up? You can’t behave like that, honey. Please sit down now. Are you bored?  I brought your book and some stuff to play with.”
• The indulgent parent says, “Ah, let them run, they’re just kids having a good time.”
• The neglectful parent says, well, nothing. The neglectful parent doesn’t notice his kid; he’s too busy reading People Magazine.

Child Development – How Point-of-View and Experience Contribute

Child development goes through a variety of stages.  Parents will remember the ‘terrible twos’ and other phases their children all went through – and – they will even recognize that cognitive development undergoes a tremendous shift in adolescence.  However, they’re not as good at remembering “how their own point-of-view shifted” as they went through these stages, largely because of so many other “experiences” they had at many different ages, times and circumstance.  The evolving innovation of qualitative research is now beginning to contribute extensively in the developmental and sport psychology literature.

Of course, each person’s genetic makeup plays a huge role in establishing the basic template from which the rest of their development takes place.  Its not just medical history that’s at work here – personality traits evolve from the make up of both biological parents. However, within that template there are thousands of experiences – and – shifts in behavioral emphasis that ultimately form a child’s personality.

Exactly How Does Parenting Factor in?

1)  Kids Learn by Watching their Parents:

Parents will readily acknowledge that modeling plays a role in how their kids turn out.  However, they rarely see it from their child’s perspective.  Kids experience their parents as being generally critical or nurturing…sometimes functional – and – sometimes dysfunctional – in regard to what their child remembers.  How that ultimately influences the child’s developing personality looks something like this:

Critical Parent

Functional –    “Good effort Kyle, but you need to stay with it a little longer to be successful.”

“Stretch a bit more – here – and you’ll reach your goal.”

Dysfunctional -  “No, no, no forget it! You’ll never get it that way.”

“What the heck is wrong with you, can’t you do anything right?”

The functional side of the critical parent recognizes effort, and, specifies the direction and level of work required for success – hence setting standards.  The dysfunctional side is demeaning and attacks the core of the child – intimating that the child is defective and likely never to measure up.

Nurturing Parent

Functional -     “Wow! You took a big hit, that cut is likely to need attention…lets get it looked at so you can get out there and play again. – Alright, you’re good to go. Have fun.”

Dysfunctional – “Oh no you don’t – this is dangerous…I’m not letting you get yourself hurt.”

The functional side of the nurturing parent acknowledges that life can be tough, and you need to recover even as you train…but when you’ve done so… it’s important to get back to your work so you can learn from it.  The dysfunctional side is over-protective and tends to supersede a child’s choice and opportunities to challenge him or herself.

Of course, the greatest challenge in parenting is KNOWING WHAT to do and WHEN to DO IT.  The Parenting Continuum above is comprised of a large number of experiences that ultimately shape the child’s behavior.  This parenting can be consciously focused and deliberately crafted – or not.  A great many parents, even to their own dismay, do exactly what their parents did even though they SWORE they’d NEVER do so.  Modeling is the key.  Our kids observe everything that we do, and their patterns are learned through repetition.

2)  Kids Learn through Their Own Interactions with the World:

It is also true that children learn from their point-of-view interactive experiences with the world at large and not exclusively from our parents’ tutelage.  There are three primary aspects of how the child experiences the environment that can have significant impact on how they develop.  As you might expect, there is a functional and dysfunctional side to each of these developmental centers of personality:

Playful Child

Functional-      “Oh boy, this is really fun!  I get to play until I have to do my homework.”

Dysfunctional- “How much fun can you have?  If a little bit is great, then a whole lot more must be that much better.”

The playful child can and usually does develop appreciation for opportunities, light-hearted encounters and positive experiences…when there is balance in understanding the proper time and place for play.  However, when one’s developing playful child evolves without a sense of limits ….self-indulgent behavior often follows.  In the extreme these kids acquire the inability to set limits and boundaries – and oftentimes they are quite susceptible to addictive disease.

Adaptive Child

Functional -     “This looks like it could be fun. I wonder who the leader is? Maybe the coach will show me how and I’ll find a way to join in.?”

Dysfunctional – “Uh-oh.  This looks scary.  I’d better hang next to the teacher/coach and do whatever they say.  Hopefully they will look after me and keep me safe.”

The adaptive child is really good at fitting in and can master social graces, learn patience and establish really useful mentorships with those who offer them skills and training.  On the other hand, the adaptive child can become a doormat afraid to go their own way or think for themselves, dependent on other people to excess.

Rebellious Child

Functional -     “They want us all to stand in line, but the leaders get to go first…so I’m going to lead.”

Dysfunctional – “So what if I get in trouble, to heck with them – I’m gonna do what I want to do.”

The rebellious child can functionally establish the proper rudiments of independent thinking – or – if dysfunction, become oppositional and, in the extreme, sociopathic.

Thankfully, personalities continue to develop throughout adolescence.  Children tend to integrate thousands of experiences within these parameters over several years.  Significant emotional events, traumas, injuries, betrayals, successes, and both fun and not-so-fun situations contribute to the lessons learned and patterns of response to life’s ups and downs.

The Emerging Adult – “Learning the Best Practices in Life”

3)  Kids Learn through Experimentation:

During the adolescent years, each child’s brain experiences a surge in development. The powers of logic, understanding, recognition of exceptions to the rule, subtleties that can determine the fine line between success and failure – are all established.  The process of integration makes big strides in the teen years.

This process of maturation affects every part of the person physically, emotionally, socially and morally.  The adult part of the personality is the one we hope every child develops through maturity, with the positive experiences and knowledgeable tutelage of great parents, coaches, teachers, team captains and leaders of all kinds.  Ultimately, one can learn to mitigate all manner of experiences in life – and balance the influences from our parents (good or bad)  as well as the lessons experienced through interacting with the universe in a positive way – or not.

If the adult part of our personality develops properly our children will grow to be both capable and lovable – competent people, great partners & teammates and good citizens.  If it doesn’t…our children may mature with an unbalanced personality. Perhaps the dysfunctional side of the critical parent will manifest – driven by anger and unrealistic expectations for what a 12 year old should be able to do.  Hence, we meet Kyle’s dad. Helicopter moms, doormat personalities, good time Charlie’s and all manner of dysfunctional people become that way for myriad of influences both genetic and experiential.  Hence, learning becomes paramount and as the gatekeepers to our children’s early life experiences – parents set the bar.

Skill building is huge and specific training regimens are key to facilitating success.  During these early adolescent years athletes learn to train.  They learn the benefit of hard work and they begin to experiment with every aspect of their work ethic.  Some will go all-out-all-of-the-time.  Some will “fake it” because it looks alright on the outside, but on the inside they feel like they are getting away with being lazy.

It is the internal recognition of effort and execution that registers the true value of training – whether in academics or learning a slap shot.  Malcolm Gladwell illustrates in hundreds of ways how those who succeed and master an endeavor will train upwards of 10,000 hours to achieve that success.  Young adolescents are at the stage where they are learning to train – older adolescents are learning to win.

As parents, coaches and mentors of athletes at every age – how we approach our athletes makes a big difference.  For when we act “in the best interests” of our athletes – we will do the right thing more often than not.  Below are some guidelines designed to help parents do a better job…giving their child athletes a better opportunity for success at every level.

Top 10 List of Things Parents Can Do to Raise a Healthy Happy Athlete

1.)    FIRST & FOREMOST – DO NO HARM!  It can be a pretty helpless feeling when you are watching your kid in the trenches, especially if you’ve got a lot of playing experience yourself.  However, criticism – expressions of anger – negativity – including unsolicited coaching tips are likely to be counterproductive – and can undermine your athletes’ coach.  Yelling, taunting, and intimidation of any kind is expressly discouraged.  Parents who do so are being abusive and engaging in behavior likely to be harmful to their child athlete.

2.)    DISCHARGE YOUR EMOTIONS IN A POSITIVE WAY.  No one expects you to observe without being fully engaged…but what you do with those emotions is important and requires care.  Just as your child athlete has assignments and a defined role on the field they are expected to practice – you have an assignment and defined role as a spectator, and as supportive parent.  PRACTICE BEING A SUPPORTIVE SPECTATOR. I’m a proponent of engaged parents getting in involved productively – keep notes of key events in the game, find an official way to help…keep stats for the team, etc. If you’ve got something productive to do during a contest – your thinking will be channeled in a positive direction.

3.)    WRITE A GAME SUMMARY after the contest.  Keep it positive.  Remember, these athletes are developing skills at EVERY level.  Key events, clock usage, reviews of stats, productive assessment of the competition, productive assessment of your team’s strengths and weaknesses can help. These are to be provided to the COACH.  Remember to make them as objective as possible.  These are observations of what happened. (If you make an interpretation – put the notes in parentheses and label them as your personal point of view.)  You can show this to the coach and ask them if this type of summary is helpful.  If it is, you now have a job supportive to the coach AND the team.  If your son or daughter wants to see the summary – it should be neutral enough for every player on the team to benefit from.  If your child WANTS you to write a summary of THEIR play – ASK them what they would want you to include in it.  Then it will truly be a resource FOR them.

4.)    IN PARENTING an athlete CONSIDER THEIR ABILITY LEVEL & WILLINGNESS TO LEARN.  If your athlete is not sure how to do something – ask the coach if they have a drill, video, or recommended mentor your athlete can work with on developing the skills in question.  If your athlete has ability but isn’t willing to put in the training time to master a skill – you can not do it for them.  You can support them by playing with them…offering practice opportunities…look for position coaches who specialize in those skills…show highlights of pros YOUR athlete admires who put in the time and got the results.

Rule of thumb:  If your athlete wants to learn but doesn’t know how – they need direction. If your athlete is able but not willing (lazy, poor practice habits, inattentive) – they need support.  Think FUNdamentals: If they aren’t having FUN they won’t want to learn.  If you are on their case about it, they may become even LESS motivated (remember the rebellious child and adolescence.)  Others are likely to be able to encourage and restore the FUN in mastering those skills – AND – Once that momentum is established in your athlete’s training regimen – you can rest a bit because your child’s motivation has been tapped.  Intrinsic motivation is huge – and – it is the birthplace of our love of sport.

5.)    BE POSITIVE FOLLOWING COMPETITIONS.  Emphasize the effort. Emphasize the fun.  If your athlete is upset, it is likely best to WAIT awhile before talking about at contest.  When the timing is right you can empathize and compassionately acknowledge how it’s sometimes hard to put in a great effort and not get the desired outcome…but always positively recognize the EFFORT and any other positives you can offer up.  A great game is a great game even if your team comes up short.  We tend to learn more when challenged to the max.

6.)    LONG AFTER a contest (hours) you can ASK YOUR ATHLETE if they would like some FEEDBACK.  IF they DO – ASK THEM WHEN. Make an appointment.  They will have had time to process it some, and, so will you.  This will take much of the emotion out of the exchange….so the focus can remain on lessons learned, skills applied, and highlights to feel good about. BE POSITIVE – Very important.

7.)    PICK NO MORE THAN 1-2 POINTS TO REVIEW.  ALWAYS START WITH POSITIVE OBSERVATIONS (both general and specific.)  Ask your athlete how they experienced the contest in the trenches.  What did they notice?  What were they focused on doing?  Did they have a specific emphasis or skill they were working on?  What was the game plan?  These kinds of questions allow you to collaborate with your athlete and understand THEIR EXPERIENCE of the contest.  If they get defensive at all – drop it immediately – because you will lose and your child will lose the gains you’ve made in establishing a collaborative exchange.  If they are confused about something, make a note to tell the coach…or better yet…if your athlete is developing the kind of confidence and personal motivation to be successful – let them experiment with you on HOW to ask the coach for extra help.

8.)    LOOK AROUND FOR WAYS TO SUPPORT YOUR ATHLETE.  If you are reading this you have already done so.  If they need help with conditioning – strength training – or speed and agility – give them the opportunity to train with an expert.  If they are unfocused or experience anxiety and you can see that it interferes with play offer them a consultation with a sport psychologist. Consider a nutritionist, take them to a clinic or talk, let them see what adult athletes do to better prepare themselves for competition. Look for readings that will help your athlete learn and grow.  These things will help you both – and – reinforce the collaboration you are developing.

9.)    TREAT INJURIES WITH COMPASSION AND TAKE THEM SERIOUSLY. When dealing with an injury of any kind – be earnest about it.  Examine the part of the body your athlete is complaining about. Look for swelling, make sure the joint is articulating properly, clean cuts and abrasions, and, do first aid if there is no trainer available.  Find a trainer if you need one.  No matter how old the athlete this piece is important. Even if you think your child is exaggerating – this might be an important learning opportunity for them – or – they may be expressing a symptom of over training and under recovery.  Be thoughtful.  Ask questions.  Yes, we all want to learn mental toughness, but NOT when an injury needs to be checked out.  The important part is focusing on the recovery, being positive and encouraging proper self-care.  Balance is key and remembering the functional side of the nurturing parent can help.  The goal is to properly evaluate the problem, provide the best practices in recovery, and get back to the fun part – playing.

10.) PLAY WITH THEM WHENEVER YOU CAN.  Remember to play – not necessarily to compete – but because it is FUN for them and you.  FUNdamentals are mastered through this kind of practice.  Not only will it help your family bond, but your athlete will appreciate your attitude – learn to love fitness – and enjoy the fact that you are proud and interested in helping them develop their skills and talents as far as they can go.

I hope that this article has been helpful and provided some good insights into athlete parenting.  Look to www.AdvanceMyAthlete.com for further applications of the best principles of applied sport psychology for you and your child.  Further information on this and other sport psychology topics are available at www.PodiumSportsJournal.com or at the web site of the author: www.drstephenwalker.com.

References and Resources:

1)                  Fraser-Thomas, J., Cote, J., Deakin, J. (2008) Examining Adolescent Sport Dropout and Prolonged Engagement from a Developmental Perspective, Journal of Applied Sport Psychology, 20:3 pgs 318-324, Routledge Press.

2)                  Davis, N., Meyer, B.B., (2008) When Sibling Becomes Competitor: A Qualitative Investigation of Same-Sex Sibling Competition in Elite Sport, Journal of Applied Sport Psychology, 20:2 pgs 220-236, Routledge Press.

3)                  Berne, E., (1992), Games People Play, Ballantine-Random House Books, NY.

4)                  To take a survey on parenting styles to see where you might land on the continuum click here: http://pediatrics.about.com/cs/quizzes/l/bl_prnt_style.htm

5)                  Gladwell, M., (2008), Outliers, The Story of Success, Little Brown & Co., New York, NY.

6)                  Mecklenburg, K., (2009), Heart of a Student Athlete, All Pro Advice for Competitors and Their Families, Booksurge Press, Denver, Co.

7)                  Vealey, R.S., (2005), Coaching for  the Inner Edge, Fitness Information Technology – Division International Center for Performance Excellence, Morgantown, WV.

8)                  Ripken, C., Wolff, R., (2006), Parenting Young Athletes the Ripken Way, Ensuring the Best Experience for Your Kids in Any Sport, Gotham Books, New York, NY.

9)                  Smith, R.E., (1989), The Parent’s Complete Guide to Youth Sports, AAPHERD Publications, Waldorf, MD.

10)              Perconte, J.S., (2007) Raising an Athlete, How to Instill Confidence, Build Skills, and Inspire a Love for Sport, PositiveParentinginSports.com.

11)              Links:        http://www.asep.com/parents/index.cfm

http://www.educ.msu.edu/ysi/forparents.htm

http://www.podiumsportsjournal.com/parenting-competitive-kids